Things to Consider Before Mediation Day
- Sileta Bell
- Aug 21
- 4 min read
Okay, so you’ve got an upcoming divorce mediation and you’re not quite sure how to prepare for it. No worries—I’ll walk you through it here, the same way I do with my clients every week. Divorce in itself is emotional enough, and mediation day can sometimes feel like another giant box to check off—one you hope doesn’t explode on you in the middle of the process.
Since opening Georgia Family Mediation here in McDonough in 2022, one of the most common questions I get asked by prospective clients is: How do I prepare for my mediation? So, let’s talk about it.
First things first: get organized.
Before mediation, I tell clients to sit down and really think about what they want to come out of the session. If your mediation was court-ordered, the judge likely wants to make sure you’ve at least tried to resolve these common issues:
Child custody and child support
Division of marital assets
Division of marital debts
Retirement accounts and savings
Alimony or spousal support
Mediation puts the power of decision-making directly in your hands instead of a judge’s, which means preparation matters. Think about each of these areas in advance. What are your “must-haves” and what are the areas where you’re willing to compromise? Knowing the difference can save you a lot of time and frustration when you’re in the room.
Good faith matters.
You are expected to show up ready to participate in good faith. That means being honest about your intentions, respectful in your tone, and realistic about what’s possible. Ask yourself: Am I walking in to fight, or am I walking in to build a resolution that works for both of us?
Parents, keep the kids at the center.
This is where things can get tough. It’s natural to feel protective or even defensive, but I encourage parents to separate emotions from logic. All negotiations in mediation should prioritize the well-being of your children, ensuring their needs, stability, and future remain at the heart of every decision.
The three outcomes of mediation.
Clients are often surprised when I tell them mediation doesn’t always end in one neat package tied with a bow. In fact, there are three potential outcomes:
Full Agreement: You and your spouse resolve all the issues on the table. Congratulations—this means you’ve essentially written the framework for your divorce together.
Partial Agreement: You’ve resolved some items but not all. Those unresolved issues may need to go back before a judge.
No Agreement: Despite your best efforts, nothing gets resolved. In this case, the court decides for you—on custody, property, finances, all of it. And let me tell you, having a judge decide your family’s future often feels a lot less satisfying than making the decisions yourself.
A few extra things to keep in mind:
Bring documentation. Having financial records, parenting schedules, debt balances, and account information at your fingertips isn’t just helpful—it’s critical. Quick, accurate access to these details can save everyone time and prevent unnecessary frustration.
Clear your schedule. While mediations are often set with a two-hour minimum, most sessions run longer. Make proper arrangements for childcare, work, and other commitments so you can focus fully on the process. And if you do have a hard stop, let your mediator know in advance.
Snacks and breaks. At Georgia Family Mediation, we provide light snacks and water during mediation. That said, if you have special dietary needs, plan accordingly and bring what you’ll need to stay comfortable.
Dress comfortably. Mediation isn’t a courtroom—it’s a much more laid-back process. You’ll likely be seated for a few hours, so wear something that helps you feel relaxed and focused.
Think long-term. As tempting as it is to focus on “winning” in the moment, mediation works best when both parties look beyond today. Decisions made in mediation shape your future life, your co-parenting relationship, and your financial stability. Keep your long-term goals in mind as you negotiate.
And if you’re wondering exactly what comes up in mediation, I’ve put together a full list of the common conversations often discussed in mediation. Reviewing it ahead of time is one of the best ways to walk in prepared.
At the end of the day, divorce mediation is an opportunity. It’s not easy, but it does allow you and the other party to take charge of your future instead of leaving it entirely in the hands of the court. Divorce will change both of your lives—mediation gives you the space to decide what those changes look like.
So, if you’ve got an upcoming mediation, take a deep breath. Get organized, know your goals, think about where you can bend, and walk in with an open mind. Whether you reach a full agreement, a partial one, or none at all, you’ll walk out knowing you gave it a fair shot—and sometimes that’s the first step toward peace.
All the best to you on this journey!
Warmly,
Sileta Bell, MMFT
Interested in working with Georgia Family Mediation?
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